September 12, 1983: "G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero" & "Inspector Gadget" Premiere

September 12, 1983: The animated TV series G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero premieres in syndication. It totally changes the image of the G.I. Joe franchise.

"Joe" was originally just one guy, originating in comic books in 1967. Seventies Joe was Indiana Jones with a beard, represented by a 12-inch-tall doll made by Hasbro, with a Kung Fu Grip and a gun. It was a doll for boys, the 1st to be called an "action figure," predating the ones made of superheroes and the characters from Star Trek. He was straight out of Mission: Impossible, an American James Bond.

You knew he was a real American hero. Nobody had to tell you that he was. He was such an American hero, he didn't need to prove it by posing with a flag.

Eighties Joe was a bunch of guys blowing stuff up, represented by 4-inch action figures. They had to advertise themselves as "a real American hero." The suave coolness of the Sixties and the sillier coolness of the Seventies had given way to the Reagan Years, where the solution to everything was, "Blow stuff up, because it's cool and loud and, as a bonus, it hurts the enemy."

And how many guys did it take to make the Eighties Joe team? Seventies Joe was the head of "the G.I. Joe Adventure Team," in radio contact with backup, but, essentially, he was one man. He was MacGyver before Richard Dean Anderson was and Indiana Jones before Harrison Ford took that role.

They were commanded by General Clayton Abernathy, a.k.a. Hawk. The more prominent members -- or, at least, the ones that seemed to catch the public's imagination the most -- were First Sergeant Conrad Hauser, a.k.a. Duke, whose multiple skills, including multiple languages, make him the usual field commander; Chief Warrant Officer Dashiell Faireborn, a.k.a. Flint, a Rhodes Scholar and a master tactician; Staff Sergeant Marvin Hinton, a.k.a. Roadblock, a black machine-gun expert; Staff Sergeant Allison Hart-Burnett, a.k.a. Lady Jaye, a covert operations specialist who eventually marries Flint; Gunnery Sergeant Ettienne LaFitte, a.k.a. Gung-Ho, a Cajun Marine; Sergeant David Katzenbogen, a.k.a. Bazooka, a missile specialist; and a pair of martial arts experts whose real name were never revealed: A man codenamed Snake Eyes and a woman codenamed Jinx.

The enemy was a terrorist organization called Cobra, a name ripped off of DC Comics' KOBRA and Marvel's HYDRA. At least they were a more believable challenge than Get Smart's KAOS. They are led by Cobra Commander, whose face was always hidden under a helmet and mask, giving him an appearance similar to Star Wars' Darth Vader, and a character Vader is often considered to be a ripoff of, Marvel's Doctor Doom, though his armor was all blue. The cover story is that his face is hidden because it has been disfigured, as with Vader and Doom. It is later revealed that he is an alien, from a planet of snake-people -- hence, "Cobra."

Dr. Mindbender is Cobra's "mad scientist." He took DNA from several military leaders known for their success and ruthlessness: Alexander the Great, Hannibal, Julius Caesar, Attila the Hun, Genghis Khan, Vlad Tepes (a.k.a. Vlad Drakula, the basis for Count Dracula) and Napoleon Bonaparte. (I guess, in 1983, America still wasn't ready for Adolf Hitler to be included.) The result was Serpentor, but all that inbred ambition led to constant conflict with Cobra Commander, each one blaming the other for Cobra's defeats.

James McCullen Destro is a major Cobra operative, a Scottish arms dealer whose clan has "played both sides" in countless wars throughout history. In spite of such double-dealing, he has, however twisted, a code of honor, never targeting the innocent, or the families of his opponents to try to coerce them into surrender or defection. He has frequently voiced his respect for the Joe Team, and for individual Joes.

And then there's Baroness Anastasia Cisarovna, the daughter of European aristocrats. Her brother had been in a political hot spot, aiding refugees, when he was taken hostage alongside the group of relief workers he had volunteered for. U.S. Army Rangers had attempted to free the hostages, but the mission was botched, and resulted in the brother's death. She joins Cobra in revenge, takes the name Baroness DeCobray, wears glasses and a skintight black catsuit, and serves as Cobra's director of intelligence.

She and Destro become romantically involved, and, in some versions of the story, even defect to the Joes together, especially after their marriage and the coming of their child. Destro and the Baroness are also the only people known to have seen the Commander ummasked.

The cartoon ran 95 episodes over 3 years; then, like most TV cartoons, the producers decided they had enough episodes to rerun them for years, making a profit without having to spend money on new content. As is usually the case when a cartoon gets that far, they turned out to be right. The comic book series continues to expand the stories.

In 1987, the animated G.I. Joe: The Movie was released direct-to-video, for fear of losing a competition with a similar cartoon-turned-movie, Transformers. A live-action film franchise was launched in 2009 with G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra, followed in 2013 by G.I. Joe: Retaliation. Neither film did well at the box office, and the only good thing about it was seeing Sienna Miller wearing the catsuit as the Baroness. (Despite being a natural blonde, she dyed her hair black for the role.)

Trying to copy both the DC and Marvel comic-film "universes," the franchise's owners decided to try again by doing standalone films about the origins of the various heroes, before teaming them up. This idea was abandoned after 2021's Snake Eyes bombed.

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On the same day, another cartoon premieres, also in syndication: Inspector Gadget. It came 10 years after The Six Million Dollar Man, and 4 years before RoboCop.

It also came 18 years after Get Smart, which starred Don Adams. On this show, Adams voiced the title character, a robotic detective with all kinds of gadgets built in. Meaning (read this in Maxwell Smart's voice), "That's the second-biggest pop-culture phenomenon he's ever seen!"

Cree Summer, best known as Freddie Brooks on A Different World, voiced Penny, his niece, who often had to get him out of trouble. Frank Welker once again voices a dog, Brain.

Gadget's boss, Chief Quimby, is voiced by Dan Hennessey in Season 1 and Maurice LaMarche (best known for voicing another Brain, of Pinky and… ) in Season 2. Of course, "Chief" had to be the title of Gadget's boss, so Don Adams could once again say, "Sorry about that, Chief!" Even the show's opening is reminiscent of that of Get Smart.

Welker also voices the villain, Doctor Claw. (Not to be confused with Paul Lynde's Hooded Claw on The Perils of Penelope Pitstop.) Like Ernst Stavro Blofeld from the James Bond films, Claw's face is never seen, only his hands and a cat on his lap.

A live-action film based on the show was released in 1999. Matthew Broderick played the Inspector.

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September 12, 1983 was a Monday. There were 5 games played in Major League Baseball:

* The New York Yankees beat the Milwaukee Brewers, 1-0 at Yankee Stadium. It took the Yankees 3 pitchers -- Ray Fontenot with 3 hits over 6 innings, George Frazier with 1 over 2, and Goose Gossage with a perfect 9th -- to pitch a 4-hit shutout, while Chuck Porter went the distance for the Brewers. The only run came in the 5th, when Willie Randolph singled Butch Wynegar home. Dave Winfield did not play. Rookie Don Mattingly went 1-for-3 with a walk.

* The New York Mets lost to the Philadelphia Phillies, 2-1 at Veterans Stadium in Philadelphia. John Denny, in a season that would see him win the National League's Cy Young Award, outpitched Ron Darling. Mike Schmidt went 1-for-2 with a walk. Pete Rose went 0-for-2 with a walk. The Mets' run came on a home run by the eventual Rookie of the Year, Darryl Strawberry.

* The Pittsburgh Pirates beat the St. Louis Cardinals, 5-3 at Three Rivers Stadium in Pittsburgh.

* The Detroit Tigers beat the Cleveland Indians, 5-1 at Tiger Stadium in Detroit.

* And the Chicago Cubs beat the Montreal Expos, 8-0 at Wrigley Field in Chicago. Dick Ruthven pitched an 8-hit shutout. Jody Davis went 3-for-4 with an RBI.

And on ABC Monday Night Football, the San Diego Chargers beat the Kansas City Chiefs, 17-14 at Arrowhead Stadium in Kansas City.

June 3, 1983: "WarGames" Premieres

June 3, 1983: WarGames premieres, directed by John Badham. It isn't the best-known movie in which Matthew Broderick uses a computer to mess with people. Nor is it the best-known movie in which Ally Sheedy plays a troubled teen. But it is considerably more important than Ferris Bueller's Day Off and The Breakfast Club. Those films were comedies. Despite some funny moments, WarGames most definitely is not a comedy.

Matthew Broderick plays David Lightman, a teenage wisenheimer in Seattle. He is a whiz with the personal computers of the time, still in their Apple II and Commodore 64 stage. As his girlfriend, Jennifer Mack, played by Ally Sheedy, looks on, he unwittingly hacks into NORAD, the North American Aerospace Defense Command, and accidentally fools one of its computer programs, designed to run simulations for everything from chess to nuclear war, into thinking he's the program's creator.

Except the game they end up playing shows up on NORAD's main screens, and they think this is real, until the game ends. They go from DEFCON 5, a Defensive Condition meaning normal peaceful relations but you still have to pay attention, to DEFCON 3, a heightened state of alert. Realizing that there is no Soviet nuclear attack coming, but still thinking they'd better pay more attention than usual, they only go back to DEFCON 4. The government sends an official, played by Dabney Coleman, to apprehend the young couple, and explains to them what they've done. He tells them that DEFCON 1 means World War III is underway.

Except the computer program isn't done. It starts running more simulations. DEFCON drops back to 3. David decides he'd better find the program's author, Professor Stephen Falken. Except he died 10 years earlier. Somehow, David figures out that Falken faked his death, escapes from custody, and tracks Falken (John Wood) down, bringing him back just in time to trick his program into seeing that the result of all "games" it can run is "WINNER: NONE," turning DEFCON 1 -- in status, if not in reality -- back to DEFCON 5. The program returns control of NORAD to its human operators.

When first released, WarGames touched on Cold War fears. Today, it touches on the fears of out-of-control artificial intelligence (AI). In any age, it shows the dangers of combining the hard work of smart humans with superiors who are lazier and dumber.

A few years before that -- and I only saw this episode for the first time during the COVID lockdown of 2020 -- there was an episode of the TV cop comedy Barney Miller. A high school student had built an atomic bomb in his garage. (It was disarmed.) As Barney pointed out, that wasn't the scary part. The scary part was that he only got a C on his science project, and Barney was afraid to ask what the kids getting A's were building.

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June 3, 1983 was a Friday. These Major League Baseball games were played that day:

* The New York Yankees lost to the Seattle Mariners, 5-0 at Yankee Stadium. Matt Young pitched a 2-hit shutout, allowing only a double by Ken Griffey Sr. and a single by Lou Piniella. Dave Winfield went 0-for-4. Ricky Nelson hit a home run for the Mariners. No, not the singer.

* The New York Mets beat the Los Angeles Dodgers, 5-2 at Dodger Stadium in Los Angeles.

* The Baltimore Orioles beat the Toronto Blue Jays, 3-2 at Memorial Stadium in Baltimore. Eddie Murray went 1-for-4 with an RBI. Cal Ripken went 1-for-3 with a walk.

* The Atlanta Braves beat the St. Louis Cardinals, 5-3 at Atlanta-Fulton County Stadium.

* The Cincinnati Reds beat the Houston Astros, 3-1 at Riverfront Stadium in Cincinnati. Johnny Bench, in his final season, went 0-for-4.

* The Chicago White Sox beat the Kansas City Royals, 2-0 at Comiskey Park in Chicago. Former Mets star Jerry Koosman pitched a 3-hit shutout for the Pale Hose. Ron Kittle hit a home run. George Brett went 2-for-4.

* The Chicago Cubs beat the Pittsburgh Pirates, 9-3 at Wrigley Field in Chicago. Yes, both Chicago teams were not only at home on the same day, but both won on the same day.

* The California Angels beat the Milwaukee Brewers, 3-0 at Milwaukee County Stadium. Ken Forsch pitched a 6-hit shutout, outpitching Don Sutton. Reggie Jackson went 2-for-4 with 2 RBIs. Fred Lynn hit a home run. Rod Carew did not play. For the Brewers, Robin Yount went 0-for-4, and Paul Molitor went 1-for-4.

* The Boston Red Sox beat the Minnesota Twins, 6-3 at the Metrodome in Minneapolis. Carl Yastrzemski, in his final season, went 1-for-4. Jim Rice hit a home run. Wade Boggs went 3-for-4 with an RBI.

* The Detroit Tigers beat the Texas Rangers, 12-1 at Arlington Stadium in the Dallas suburb of Arlington, Texas.

* The San Diego Padres beat the Philadelphia Phillies, 8-5 at Jack Murphy Stadium in San Diego. They did this despite Tony Gwynn not playing. Mike Schmidt and Tony Pérez hit home runs. Pete Rose went 0-for-3, but drew a walk, and had an RBI on a sacrifice fly.

* The Montreal Expos beat the San Francisco Giants, 9-2 at Candlestick Park in San Francisco.

* And the Cleveland Indians and the Oakland Athletics were rained out at Cleveland Municipal Stadium. The game was made up as part of a doubleheader 2 days later. The A's swept, 8-3 and 9-2. Over the 2 games, Rickey Henderson went 4-for-10 with a stolen base and 4 RBIs.